The stigma of money

One of the most valuable things I’ve learned on this debt journey is it becomes easier once you take away the stigma of money.

In general people are incredibly open about every other area of their lives, but when it comes to money that all changes. You’re not supposed to know how much your friends earn, you can’t know what debt they have, what they spend on things in their lives or what they have saved. It’s considered vulgar to talk about and rude to ask but, for us, it’s made it so much easier when we can talk about it!

We have great friends in our lives and the ones that we are closest too are the ones that we talk about money with. Just as it’s made our marriage even better by talking about money, it’s also made our friendships better as well. At the start it was a softly softly approach, the mention of a budget or a passing comment on paying off debt but then we realised how great it was to just lay out the numbers! We started telling people in detail what our numbers were. I started talking about how I was working on bringing areas of my budget down or started explaining why I was saying no to going out. All our friends know what we earn and it’s not to show off, it just gives a perspective on the debt payoff that we’re aiming for. The more I’ve talked about it the easier it’s got too talk about it.

Once we did start talking about it a fantastic thing happened- other people started talking to us about their finances as well. We realised that (although our numbers may be high) we’re not actually the only idiots in the world who didn’t know where their wages disappeared to!

It worked for us in three ways when we opened up about our money.
1- it’s easy to tell people that we can’t do something or suggest an alternative, free, plan of events
2- it took a bit of the guilt away for getting into this situation. We realised that everyone has debt in a varying degree and it didn’t make us terrible humans
3- it made us a bit more accountable for it. If you’re talking about it and being asked about it from people outside of your relationship then you want to keep on track that little bit more.

Peer pressure is a very real thing, it’s just changed now so that what we want to be doing well in is paying off debt, being self sufficient and planning for retirement 😂!

Have you found anything that’s made it easier to get debt free?

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Preserving- looking for inspiration!

One of the most important things I want to be able to do this year is preserve our food. I currently rely on my freezer to keep most of our food which, while useful, isn’t ideal. I don’t like the thought that if our power was to go off then we would lose most of our food!

Last year I tried a few different ways to use our foraged and grown food. I made my first ever attempts at jam, blackberry liqueur and red onion chutney. All of them worked which was an unexpected surprise! However there were some drawbacks. 

For a start I didn’t realise just how little chutney would be produced from what I thought was a decent harvest of our onions. I spent hours chopping and reducing my onions to only end up with three small jars. This seemed like a poor use of time I could have otherwise spent in the garden. 

*I have just been informed by my husband that I have an attachment for my mixer that would have done all that dicing in seconds-thanks for letting me know!* 

Secondly I really need to get an outdoor space to cook if I’m going to be spending any amount of time boiling vinegar- that’s a scent that really sticks! My jam making went well but my first attempt (plum and apple) was overboiled. Its still very edible but definitely over set and more akin to jelly. Lastly my blackberry liquer. Its an absolute winner for taste, and was super over Christmas in a glass of fizz, but made using shop bought wine. I’d definitely like to try a homebrew for this year.

There were some unsuccessful attempts as well… I tried grating and freezing my courgettes for baking some vegan cakes with- that was a disaster. I also have no idea of the best way to store my apples and potatoes. Does anyone have any successful methods they’ve used?

For this year I’m hoping to have a lot more food to store and preserve. I’ve been looking into canning, dehydrating and pickling as methods of preservation but to be honest I have no idea where to start…it also all seems to cost a lot of money to get setup initially. Not so helpful to our budget. I know though that I’ll have to spend some money to save in the long term. It does just feel like another setback from paying off the debt though…

We’re lucky that we currently stay by a canal which has an abundance of bramble and raspberry bushes. This means I’m saving a whole load of space in our garden and still able to get some fantastic berries. I harvested 3kg of blackberries and could have had more just from the nightly dog walks. One thing I’d love to make is some cordial to use for squash. If I was able to make this instead of buying it then it could end up saving us a lot of money. 

I’ve been looking at this years planting and there’s just too many things I’d love to grow. I’m as easily seduced by a seed catalogue as most women are supposed to be in a shoe shop! I want them all. So I’m trying to be judicious in what we grow. I want to have proposed methods for storing anything that we do grow before we even start. If you have any preferred varieties of veg for preserving then please let me know 🙂

I aim to make tomato sauce for pasta and pizzas, I’d like to try tomato puree as well. I’d also like to try pickled onions and beetroot, different jams and chutneys but after that I’m stuck on what else I can make…I’m definitely looking for inspiration!